The Many Faces of Sri Lanka

Tea picker, Haputale

Tea picker, Haputale

SRI means splendour or splendid and Lanka means Island. I returned home from Sri Lanka a few days ago but the places and people I encountered remain etched in my memory. Please enjoy this photo blog which explores the many faces I met on my journey.

I worshipped with the monks in Kandy…



I played with the children…




Met the market women…



Admired the beautiful girls…



And met some cool dudes…




The Global Goddess travelled in Sri Lanka as a guest of Intrepid Travel –


Single in Sri Lanka


LYNDAL is devastatingly thin like Audrey Hepburn…and sports the mouth of a sailor. Only half of this sentence is true. Lyndal may have urged me to describe her as the screen siren while peppering our conversation with profanities but Hepburn, eat your heart out, for Lyndal is rolled gold. I’m on a 12-day Real Food Adventure with Intrepid Travel through Sri Lanka and Lyndal is one of the 10 colourful companions with whom I am travelling.

The lovely Lyndal

The lovely Lyndal

My adventures in this mystical land in the middle of the Indian Ocean start well before I meet my travelling party. Mozart is inexplicably being piped through the arrival’s hall of Colombo’s Bandaranayike International when I disembark at 1am, and among the usual swag of Duty Free cosmetics, cigarettes and alcohol, there’s a store selling washing machines. Just what I always imagined I needed after a 16-hour trek from Australia, a Simpson 5kg front loader.


A tropical downpour greets me on the street unlike the driver who has been arranged to meet me. Just as I’m about to chalk up yet another bloke who has refused to keep a date, someone kindly points to an obscure man sitting in a dark corner who it turns out is my “fixer”. He leads me to a car and the driver takes off into the inky night. We weave in and out of empty back alleys and the exotic blend of heaving humidity, travel exhaustion, and mild anxiety prompts me to break into a cold sweat. Half way to my hotel, when I am almost convinced this is how I will finally meet my maker, he pauses to point to a name of his manifest which is meant to be mine. I’m sorry Linda Treware, but I hope you enjoyed your evening being me and eventually arrived safely at your destination.


As fate would have it, several hours later at breakfast I meet Linda, or Laura as it turns out. A lovely American Jewish girl, Laura says “I’m basically Beyonce. My alter ego is a black girl with a big arse who says ‘fuck you bitch’.” At this moment I know Laura and I will be life-long friends.

The lovely Laura

The lovely Laura

For a food tour, we seem to be doing a lot of temples including the towering Sigiriya Rock Fortess with its 1000-odd steps and a height of 1120 metres which I miraculously climb. Regular readers will remember that among my long list of neuroses The Global Goddess is petrified of heights and some may even recall the trip in which my sister and me climbed the Remarkables in New Zealand…only to have me abandon my sister in a white-out while I begged two sherpas to carry me down that slippery little slope, sobbing hysterically. On this journey down I vow not to cry and instead channel my inner Peter Allen and chant I Still Call Australia Home as I leave what I can only describe as the “death zone”. I later learn from one of my travelling companions that someone passing them on the way to the summit asked whether they knew the strange English woman who was singing. On the plus side (and there is always an opposite reaction according to the Buddhist teachings in Sri Lanka) I haven’t had to wear my “temple dress” – lest my sexy knees and shoulders provoke unwanted attention – in days.


The “summit” or “death zone” as I like to call it

It would be fair to say I knew nothing about Sri Lanka before I arrived here 9 days ago and due to a hectic travel schedule this year have had even less time to do any research. So appalling was my knowledge of this country that I am half convinced a Tamil Tiger is an exotic Asian cat. I do glance at my trip notes before I depart which suggest I have access to $USD500 “in case of civil unrest”. I wonder whether this means I will be allowed to trot down to the ATM if a war erupts or whether I should bury some greenbacks on my person. A girlfriend suggests I should stash cash in my underwear as “no one will ever look there”. What I do find is a country filled with heart and soul and the most peaceful of people.


The weekend just gone found me in Kandy where I held a vague hope that I may meet the elusive man of my dreams, or in this instance, a Kandy Man. We attend the Kandy Cultural Show where one of the acts is described as “10 male damsel drummers in harmony”. There is even one fine fella in the show who smiles at me and drops his tambourine, such is my sex appeal, but our interaction ends there. I half hope that the yoga teacher we visit that afternoon will yield more luck in the romance stakes, but my fantasy is dashed when he hands out what he calls a “special herbal cream” and instructs us to rub it on our boobs and face. I look at the container, and it’s a jar of Vicks Vapor Rub. But as Buddha would say, every action has an opposition reaction and on the plus side my boobs have never felt hotter.


The Global Goddess is in Sri Lanka as a guest of Intrepid Travel –


Postcard from Sri Lanka


I’ve just arrived in Sri Lanka on assignment and in the 9 short hours I’ve been here great travel mishaps are already finding me! I’ll be back as soon as I can to tell you all about the case of the mistaken identity and how a man on a beach just tried to sell me a pregnant elephant. Please also follow me on Instagram @aglobalgoddess for more pics along the way. Love & Light, The Global Goddess. Xx

Postcard: The Characters of Canada

Captain Seymour Fog

Captain Seymour Fogg

I’m home from Canada and before I head off on my next trip, I thought I’d sign off with some of the characters I met on this incredible journey. Canadians, it must be said, are the most perky people you’ll ever meet. Fresh, friendly, fun…see below why I adored them so much.
The place is littered with fine fishermen...

The place is littered with fine fishermen…

And then there’s the real deal…
Aw, shucks...Colton is an oyster fisherman

Aw, shucks…Colton is an oyster fisherman

Brad is not only extremely good looking, but he also catches scallops. (Did I mention that Brad is good looking?)

Brad is not only extremely good looking, but he also catches scallops. (Did I mention that Brad is good looking?)

It's scarecrow season in Nova Scotia

It’s scarecrow season in Nova Scotia

This shady dude didn't say much...

This shady dude didn’t say much…

Lowell taught me all about lobster sex...

Lowell taught me all about lobster sex…

While Jonathon cooked me a lobster

While Jonathon cooked me a lobster

And Pete, the butcher, made me a sausage

While Peter, the butcher, made me a sausage

The Global Goddess travelled to Canada as a guest of Destination Canada